The Music Forum
The Music Forum

A place for a friendly chat about what music you like
 
HomeHome  RegisterRegister  Log in  

Share | 
 

 Aircraft Jokes

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
stella
Moderator
Moderator
avatar

Female Number of posts : 357
Age : 42
Location : Worcester
Registration date : 2008-07-07

PostSubject: Aircraft Jokes   Mon Jul 20, 2009 10:39 am

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks the stewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot squawks "And get me a whisky you cow!" The stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for the parrot and forgets the coffee.

When this omission is pointed out to her the parrot drains its glass and bawls "And get me another whisky you idiot". Quite upset, the girl comes back shaking with another whisky but still no coffee.

Unaccustomed to such slackness the man tries the parrot's approach "I've asked you twice for a coffee, go and get it now or I'll kick you".

The next moment, both he and the parrot have been wrenched up and thrown out of the emergency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For someone who can't fly, you complain too much!"


Last edited by stella on Mon Jul 20, 2009 10:41 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top Go down
stella
Moderator
Moderator
avatar

Female Number of posts : 357
Age : 42
Location : Worcester
Registration date : 2008-07-07

PostSubject: Re: Aircraft Jokes   Mon Jul 20, 2009 10:41 am

Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural America. Panic stricken the Secret Service mobilized and descended on the farm in force. When they got there, the wreckage was clear. The aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hulk left smoldering in a tree line that bordered a farm. Secret Service descended upon the smoking hulk but could find no remains of the crew or the President's staff. To their amazement, a lone farmer was plowing a field not too far away as if nothing at all happened. They hurried over to surround the man's tractor.

"Sir," the senior Secret Service agent asked, panting and out of breath.

"Did you see this terrible accident happen?"

"Yep. Sure did." The man muttered unconcernedly.

"Do you realize that is the President of the United States airplane?"

"Yep."

"Were there any survivors?" the agent gasped.

"Nope. They's all kilt straight out." The farmer sighed cutting off his tractor motor. "I done buried them all myself. Took most of the morning."

"The President of the United States is dead?" The agent gulped in disbelief.

"Well," the farmer sighed, obviously wanting to get back to his work. "He kept a-saying he wasn't ... but you know what a liar he is."
Back to top Go down
stella
Moderator
Moderator
avatar

Female Number of posts : 357
Age : 42
Location : Worcester
Registration date : 2008-07-07

PostSubject: Re: Aircraft Jokes   Mon Jul 20, 2009 10:42 am

Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate.

After an hour-long wait, it finally took off.

A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, "What was the problem?"

"The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine," explained the Flight Attendant, "and it took us a while to find a new pilot."
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Aircraft Jokes   

Back to top Go down
 
Aircraft Jokes
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» tommy cooper jokes
» Male Blonde Jokes
» Pigeon JOKES
» Only clean jokes please
» More non-PC jokes

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
The Music Forum :: Crack pot corner :: Joke's-
Jump to: